Ladies and gentlemen, it pains us to bring you this most tragic of slideshows. Actually, it really doesn’t. In fact, we’re rather excited to showcase what the future might hold for BMW should this current fascination with fantastically large grilles be allowed to continue unchecked. Perhaps this in-your-face display of kidneys gone wild will at least encourage designers in Munich to think twice before travelling further down this road.

Us scribes work very hard to keep a neutral tone, but frankly, we’re a bit worried about BMW. This big-grille fad is as ridiculous as the pet rock only without the cool hipster factor. It’s as off-putting as listening to glam rock on a scratched-up record. We blame Lexus for this, and while some brands have pulled off the gaping grille with admirable results – we’re looking at you, Audi RS6 Avant – oversized kidneys basically turn every BMW into a beaver joke waiting to happen. That’s not a good thing.

We aren’t alone on this. Peruse the comments of any articles referencing this outlandish nose and you’ll find plenty of criticism. Rendering artists the world over have attempted to make the big grille look better, while others – including the anonymous designer who graciously sent us the designs featured above – are ready to show us a world where every BMW is, in a word, ugly. And yes, with BMW’s deep involvement in the Toyota Supra, we couldn’t resist leading with a makeover that could well come to the Supra’s convertible twin, the Z4. Sure, the facelift could’ve been on an actual Z4, but seeing the double kidney on a Supra has a bit more shock factor.

Jump into the slideshow at the top of this article to see just how deep – and how big – this kidney-shaped rabbit hole can grow.